hmm...how to start...im getting fatter n fatter by the day..sighs...i dunno wat is goin on...im still eating regular meals...not too much..now have to go on a diet plan...maybe its the side effect of the medicine im taking...still my thyroid hasn gone down...im a lil worried about it...
now my weight problem...i hv to control wat im eating already...hv to go for regular exercise...to cut down on my weight..swimming perhaps..im looking for a gym tat provides the best facilities and coach too...hehehe..
Just last sunday...i remembered...mum heard that he doesn hav a HP to use..so mum took her personal phone tat he bought n gave it to him...let him use..n mum will b using her company's Hp..but he refuses...he scolded mum..n said " i dare to throw the Hp away..u guys look down on me n all" then he put the phone at the living room table...
i dont wanna bother too much anymore...b4 tat i was taking an afternoon nap..n was awaken by the sound of arguements between mum n dad...i was thinking.. when will all these end?
mum said tat the 5 of us should sit down n talk...then she said later tat night that v've got to wait for aunt millie to come up n then we'll talk...i was thinking when is aunt millie coming up? if she doesnt comes up..when will this talk start? nvr?
whenever im depressed... i will eat..i will gorge myself...or i will go out with frank to cool myself off...but nowadays frank not free...so i ate.. n i ate..like ther's no full stop to me...
wat can i do??any help?
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
28th March 2009 @ 11.30am
i realise my blog are always on yesterday's story...hmm..
well this is new...yesterday mum came home... her left leg is in pain...so we went over to look for a physician in BM...(after dinner with aunty)..after that he called...he knows mum's home...i also dunno how..mayb the house is cleaner? or mayb he saw mum's bag... yea he saw mum's bag...askin us to buy something for him to eat...mum said there's no restaurant there n all... well hell yea there's nothing there coz its a housing estate..all u can see are houses... but still when we're on our wa home..mum still buy something 4 him to eat...
then he complain n complain about the situation of our house n all to mum...how i wish to SLAP him...he's like a cry baby to me...im so angry at him..always complain...SIGHSS...!! i had ENOUGH !!!
i really hope tat he could get out of the house... n let us live or own life...
well this is new...yesterday mum came home... her left leg is in pain...so we went over to look for a physician in BM...(after dinner with aunty)..after that he called...he knows mum's home...i also dunno how..mayb the house is cleaner? or mayb he saw mum's bag... yea he saw mum's bag...askin us to buy something for him to eat...mum said there's no restaurant there n all... well hell yea there's nothing there coz its a housing estate..all u can see are houses... but still when we're on our wa home..mum still buy something 4 him to eat...
then he complain n complain about the situation of our house n all to mum...how i wish to SLAP him...he's like a cry baby to me...im so angry at him..always complain...SIGHSS...!! i had ENOUGH !!!
i really hope tat he could get out of the house... n let us live or own life...
Monday, March 23, 2009
23rd March 2009 @ 8.45pm
everything starts from yesterday morning....
when me n mei r getting ready to go to church.. he was sitting there..awaiting for us to give him $$...then he asks mei to ask me to give him ten bucks... i told mei i've got no $$ already..then i went out to prepare my baby bike to get ready to travel...he told mei tat we're very rude... at tat time mei was listening to music with her earpiece on but she can hear a thing or two...
then when we got home after church...mei told me tat she's very tired of seeing him home everytime...when he's not home she's happy n relax..n i felt the same too...nowadays a lot of things has been happenin...for me n mei...we dun like to get home early..we hope tat we can get home as late as we possibly could...when im at work..i wish tat i can do my job as late as it can b..so tat i dun need to face him nor see him..but for mei she has to face him when he's home...or she'll lock herself inside mum's room n nvr get out unless she has to...
we were saying about him on the way home..mei said...having a father like him..its like not having a father at all..im very proud of my friends.. for they've got wonderful dad who can WORK! although minimal of them are like crippal or like him got hands n feet that can WORK!
as in for now...im putting my first priority place is mei....i have to protect her...since da jie went over to penang island to work n she's nvr home often...my mum.. she's in pdg besar working..n not home oftenly too...i have to protect mei..
then da jie n her bf took us out for a movie n shopping...he saw da jie's bf car passed by in front of him..n we saw him too..then he went home n called da jie saying tat she dare not see him...n asking for $$ from her..da jie said..she'll give him e $$ when she gets home...then we went to watch "race to the witch mountain" hmm can say that its a good movie..really very nice one...then da jie have to buy her office wear..due to she has to go to PWTC for an exibhition...
then he kept calling n calling da jie..da jie dun wan2 pick up..then he called mei...
mei said that he's demanding for $$..saying tat he's goin to work...n wans to buy 4D...mei said to him tat da jie's bf got to buy something we cannot rush him de ma..coz he's the one driving,,,if u rush him dun u feel embarassed? he said tat we're giving all e excuses n all of these r nonsense...OMG my face totali changed when i heard tat...the happy mood tat me n mei r in... r destroyed by him..our faces turn black...n we've got no mood to shop nemore...
mei said she doesn wan to go home tat early..but da jie say she has to..or else he'll keep botherin us...
Y IN THE WORLD TAT I HAVE THIS KIND OF A FATHER??!!!
IM REALLY TIRED!!! I WAN2 GET OUT OF THIS SITUATION!!! ARGH!!!
when me n mei r getting ready to go to church.. he was sitting there..awaiting for us to give him $$...then he asks mei to ask me to give him ten bucks... i told mei i've got no $$ already..then i went out to prepare my baby bike to get ready to travel...he told mei tat we're very rude... at tat time mei was listening to music with her earpiece on but she can hear a thing or two...
then when we got home after church...mei told me tat she's very tired of seeing him home everytime...when he's not home she's happy n relax..n i felt the same too...nowadays a lot of things has been happenin...for me n mei...we dun like to get home early..we hope tat we can get home as late as we possibly could...when im at work..i wish tat i can do my job as late as it can b..so tat i dun need to face him nor see him..but for mei she has to face him when he's home...or she'll lock herself inside mum's room n nvr get out unless she has to...
we were saying about him on the way home..mei said...having a father like him..its like not having a father at all..im very proud of my friends.. for they've got wonderful dad who can WORK! although minimal of them are like crippal or like him got hands n feet that can WORK!
as in for now...im putting my first priority place is mei....i have to protect her...since da jie went over to penang island to work n she's nvr home often...my mum.. she's in pdg besar working..n not home oftenly too...i have to protect mei..
then da jie n her bf took us out for a movie n shopping...he saw da jie's bf car passed by in front of him..n we saw him too..then he went home n called da jie saying tat she dare not see him...n asking for $$ from her..da jie said..she'll give him e $$ when she gets home...then we went to watch "race to the witch mountain" hmm can say that its a good movie..really very nice one...then da jie have to buy her office wear..due to she has to go to PWTC for an exibhition...
then he kept calling n calling da jie..da jie dun wan2 pick up..then he called mei...
mei said that he's demanding for $$..saying tat he's goin to work...n wans to buy 4D...mei said to him tat da jie's bf got to buy something we cannot rush him de ma..coz he's the one driving,,,if u rush him dun u feel embarassed? he said tat we're giving all e excuses n all of these r nonsense...OMG my face totali changed when i heard tat...the happy mood tat me n mei r in... r destroyed by him..our faces turn black...n we've got no mood to shop nemore...
mei said she doesn wan to go home tat early..but da jie say she has to..or else he'll keep botherin us...
Y IN THE WORLD TAT I HAVE THIS KIND OF A FATHER??!!!
IM REALLY TIRED!!! I WAN2 GET OUT OF THIS SITUATION!!! ARGH!!!
Saturday, March 21, 2009
21st March 2009 @ 4pm
yesterday night when da jie send us home from dinner... then she left..without stepping in to our home...
he's at home at that time... after da jie left...we went inside... n then he said.. "Y? she dun wan to come down? scare that i will take the waja?" mei said she got some problems in her office tats y she has to rush back...he said tat all these excuses are nonsense...
then he called mum..saying tat we all pakat n all.. i dun wanna hear anything coming out from his mouth so i went n changed n got into my mum's room to watch TV n sleep there...while i was watching TV together with mei... he came in n "perli" me...saying tat i sms mum n tell her watever he's doin nowadays n all.. ask me to send an sms to mum tat instance... i treat him as if he's invisible although im very furious on wat's he saying..n mocking at me...after he finishes his story... i sms mum asking her not to come home already..coz this house is in a total disaster..its not the home she wants...mum tot i was gonna fight him by talking back..coz i know i have to protect mei...tat's y i didn do it...
If mei is not tired after coming back from camp i might do it...i dun mind of getting beaten n all..coz i know wat im doin...i wan him out of this house..im so tired of all these..somebody has got to face him..really.. to mum i dun really knows wat she wants..at first she said she wans a seperation..now.. there's not even one move to prove that she really wans... so this leads to wat he really wans...he's all over mum already...climbing up to her head,...has the control of all...
EVRYTHING got to STOP!!! im really TIRED!!! i really wan to GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE!!!
he's at home at that time... after da jie left...we went inside... n then he said.. "Y? she dun wan to come down? scare that i will take the waja?" mei said she got some problems in her office tats y she has to rush back...he said tat all these excuses are nonsense...
then he called mum..saying tat we all pakat n all.. i dun wanna hear anything coming out from his mouth so i went n changed n got into my mum's room to watch TV n sleep there...while i was watching TV together with mei... he came in n "perli" me...saying tat i sms mum n tell her watever he's doin nowadays n all.. ask me to send an sms to mum tat instance... i treat him as if he's invisible although im very furious on wat's he saying..n mocking at me...after he finishes his story... i sms mum asking her not to come home already..coz this house is in a total disaster..its not the home she wants...mum tot i was gonna fight him by talking back..coz i know i have to protect mei...tat's y i didn do it...
If mei is not tired after coming back from camp i might do it...i dun mind of getting beaten n all..coz i know wat im doin...i wan him out of this house..im so tired of all these..somebody has got to face him..really.. to mum i dun really knows wat she wants..at first she said she wans a seperation..now.. there's not even one move to prove that she really wans... so this leads to wat he really wans...he's all over mum already...climbing up to her head,...has the control of all...
EVRYTHING got to STOP!!! im really TIRED!!! i really wan to GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE!!!
Monday, March 16, 2009
16th March 2009 @ 8.00pm
GOD!!! its Frustrating!!!
yesterday suppose to b a day to let mum to b happy about when we celebrated her b'day earlier..coz she's not gonna b here on her b'day...
jess drove back grandpa's car...n when we came back after dinner jess acted quickly..she took the waja n drove back to Penang.. n she juz walk off like dat...she doesnt know wats the consequences gonna b..she juz leave it there!!
then he scolded mum n blame mum for everything..saying tat we've planned it all..saying tat we all are in a group goin against him...all those ridiculous stuffs is coming out from his mouth..n he made mum cried...!! how i wish i could tell him off... but mum said dun...better dun... I hate HIM!!!! y dun he changed?? driving an older car aint a matter its not gonna pull ur pride down..to me if there's a car for me to drive sure! i will drive...wats there to b compared?? modern n old? to me older car like nissan sunny its good! wats there to b complaint about??
then after a moment he asks mum for money..i dunno y..but i gave him the money instead...im so dissapointed in him...really im dissapointed... i feel like crying out loud now but i wont cry when there's ppl around...coz... they'll ask y? wat happen? i dun feel like answering those questions..
who can get me out of this AGONY!!! PAIN!!!??? HELP??
yesterday suppose to b a day to let mum to b happy about when we celebrated her b'day earlier..coz she's not gonna b here on her b'day...
jess drove back grandpa's car...n when we came back after dinner jess acted quickly..she took the waja n drove back to Penang.. n she juz walk off like dat...she doesnt know wats the consequences gonna b..she juz leave it there!!
then he scolded mum n blame mum for everything..saying tat we've planned it all..saying tat we all are in a group goin against him...all those ridiculous stuffs is coming out from his mouth..n he made mum cried...!! how i wish i could tell him off... but mum said dun...better dun... I hate HIM!!!! y dun he changed?? driving an older car aint a matter its not gonna pull ur pride down..to me if there's a car for me to drive sure! i will drive...wats there to b compared?? modern n old? to me older car like nissan sunny its good! wats there to b complaint about??
then after a moment he asks mum for money..i dunno y..but i gave him the money instead...im so dissapointed in him...really im dissapointed... i feel like crying out loud now but i wont cry when there's ppl around...coz... they'll ask y? wat happen? i dun feel like answering those questions..
who can get me out of this AGONY!!! PAIN!!!??? HELP??
Saturday, March 14, 2009
14th March 2009 @ 3.50pm
im still working as usual...earning for OTs =earning for much more money...
there's a new open gym in the neighbourhood... i wan2 ask how much is to apply for their membership...
if it is reasonable i wan to do my exercise there...its been a long time since i've work out...been too bz earning n doin for OTs...got no time to go n work out...so got really fat already..so since i've got the time now...hehe..
yesterday night he came home n saw mum...
came into the room where all of us are at...asking for mum's credit card n money...
credit card for petrol n money is for spending...
no matter how mum said tat she got no more money he still insist on it..
then mum got no choice bt to giv him in...
at tat time how i wish i could speak out..bt something keep holding me back...
its like something shut my mouth up..sighs..
i failed to defend my mum again...im such a failure...
tomorrow is gonna b a thunder day...
coz jess is goin to pick up the car from grandpa...
n exchange it with him... i dunno what's gonna happen next.. will tell u when the story happens...
tomolo sure there's an arguement to go on...how i wish i could get out of the house n let them finsh it themselves...
bt i cant..coz i have to defend for one of them... on the other hand i cant drive...cant really get out...
this arguement is gonna last till i duno when...
for now im juz hoping tat he get out from this house..
in additional... we're goin to celebrate mum's b'day earlier.coz she's not gonna b here on her b'day...
wat to do for her to be suprise? hope she likes suprises...its gonna be a Happy Earlier B'day MUM!! hehe...
hope everythin turns out right...
there's a new open gym in the neighbourhood... i wan2 ask how much is to apply for their membership...
if it is reasonable i wan to do my exercise there...its been a long time since i've work out...been too bz earning n doin for OTs...got no time to go n work out...so got really fat already..so since i've got the time now...hehe..
yesterday night he came home n saw mum...
came into the room where all of us are at...asking for mum's credit card n money...
credit card for petrol n money is for spending...
no matter how mum said tat she got no more money he still insist on it..
then mum got no choice bt to giv him in...
at tat time how i wish i could speak out..bt something keep holding me back...
its like something shut my mouth up..sighs..
i failed to defend my mum again...im such a failure...
tomorrow is gonna b a thunder day...
coz jess is goin to pick up the car from grandpa...
n exchange it with him... i dunno what's gonna happen next.. will tell u when the story happens...
tomolo sure there's an arguement to go on...how i wish i could get out of the house n let them finsh it themselves...
bt i cant..coz i have to defend for one of them... on the other hand i cant drive...cant really get out...
this arguement is gonna last till i duno when...
for now im juz hoping tat he get out from this house..
in additional... we're goin to celebrate mum's b'day earlier.coz she's not gonna b here on her b'day...
wat to do for her to be suprise? hope she likes suprises...its gonna be a Happy Earlier B'day MUM!! hehe...
hope everythin turns out right...
Thursday, March 12, 2009
13th March 2009 @ 7pm
yesterday when i got home i was shock to see the house had a change of the "FENG SHUI"...
it means tat change of TV's position, where the house gate shud be open..
i bet that he got nothing to do...tat's y he's trying to do something to our home...
that's a change... but im not use to the new environment...
these days has been raining..which kept me to be really cold n freezing..
plus cant ride my motorcycle back when its still raining until 8pm (when im off duty)
lucky my aunt was living quite near to my house so can get a free ride home...
she's a great aunt.. she even offered to come n fetch me when i dont have any transportation to work...
im now trying to apply for my dream job... i've tried searching for air asia to see whether is there any vacancies available for cabin crew.. sighs...no vancancies at the moment..oh well i did my resume online through their network..
n im hoping for the best... im goin to try out for SIA, Malaysia Airlines so on n so forth... hope tat im eligible to get in... *crossing my fingers..
it means tat change of TV's position, where the house gate shud be open..
i bet that he got nothing to do...tat's y he's trying to do something to our home...
that's a change... but im not use to the new environment...
these days has been raining..which kept me to be really cold n freezing..
plus cant ride my motorcycle back when its still raining until 8pm (when im off duty)
lucky my aunt was living quite near to my house so can get a free ride home...
she's a great aunt.. she even offered to come n fetch me when i dont have any transportation to work...
im now trying to apply for my dream job... i've tried searching for air asia to see whether is there any vacancies available for cabin crew.. sighs...no vancancies at the moment..oh well i did my resume online through their network..
n im hoping for the best... im goin to try out for SIA, Malaysia Airlines so on n so forth... hope tat im eligible to get in... *crossing my fingers..
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