5th April 2011-Tuesday

I went for Martin's seminar n it's was awesome.. His talk did gave me some inspirations n advice thru his words..so aft the talk.. He said he wanna talk to me abt my prob.. So we talked for like 10 mins aft his session..

When I got in e car.. Before tht I told mum that martin wanna talk to me for a while.. So I got in e car.. She asked me y did I took so long to come out while others r out? I told her that I'm talking to Martin.. My mum says.. Dun go n join all e youth gatherings n all.. I dun like.. I was quiet e whole time during e journey home..

Well.. As i've said, I had to stop every activities that I'm joining which includes being in e choir which i love so much for church n mixing wit my friends in church.. When I told u that I saw "him" last Sunday.. I was terrified when I saw him in mass ystday.. All e flashback of e past memories of wad had happen brings tears to my eyes.. I'm realli scared to b here.. I am realli terrified..

Now.. All I wan is a new start in a new environment.. Friends n family please pray that I get e cabin crew job for firefly airlines n to b based in JB. N I realli hope that I'll get e job.. All I wan is a new start ..a new start...

3rd April 2011-Sunday

Every memories of my past has came back when I saw him today in mass... All those dark side of it... I dowan anything to start over again.. I dowan to remember all these stuff.. It brings tears to my eyes.. I'm terrified.. I'm scared.. Idk wad to do.. Bt all I wan to is to leave here.. Y does all these memories has to b back?? Y is she tracking my every moves?? Y is she doing this?? Y..?? I didn't do anything wrong.. She made Everything up.. Throwing fake stories all over.. Y does she wanna destroy my life?? Y is she doing this to me?? I'm reali scared.. I wanna leave here.. Ppl.. Pray that I get the job in Firefly Airlines.. Help me pray that I get e job n be based in Johor Bahru.. Please... God please..