sighs..
Sometimes, its really disappointing..
Elizabeth from Choice group called me on Saturday, asked me whether Esther n I wanna go for their annual dinner.. So we said yes..
Cause this dinner was the only chance for us to join in Choice group.. N as planned a long time ago, that Esther n I wanted to join Choice to be a part of them.
Choice is an organization where they gather Catholic working youth adults together.. To go on adventures,to help out, to do most of the things together..
So talked abt the dinner, Elizabeth called while i was in the car with mum n told me that she had passed the tickets to Fiona,whom also from Choice.So i said ok.. N mum asked who called la.. so i said that it was Elizabeth n told her all about the Choice group n about the dinner. She seems ok with it.. but its juz one problem, who's gonna fetch me there.. I told her that Esther is oso coming.. N mum's face totally change, n said no cannot go..
So cerita came la.. She told me not to be with Esther for too much as she's goin to b a bad influence to me.. this n that la..
I was like.. Esther is not lidat.. The Esther I know is kind,funny n mostly outgoing.. She has great parents.. Its not that I'm saying that mum is not good.. Mum's the best of all but then she's too controlling over me..
N by juz listening to what others is saying,she claim that everything is either bad or good.. Bt I hope that she could know Esther like I know her.. N i realli hope that she listens to my point of view of Esther.. But I doubt that she listens..
Sometimes, I would like to tell mum that I'm growing up.. I know what's right n what's wrong.. Yes,sometimes its abt ppl thinking that their friends are good while others knows that they're bad.. But I know what I'm doin.. I know where I go n what I'm doin..
I realli hope that mum realli could understand me.. I realli do hope that this day could come..
Monday, December 20, 2010
My memories with my beloved Grandpa who's in heaven now..
Grandpa admitted into Loh Guan Lye Specialists Hospital on the 26th Nov 2010. Coz on that very morning,he woke up n fell down from his bed.. Grandpa did try to stand up but he couldnt.. When he tried,he fell again.. That's how his head got into the dustbin. Around 6-7am,the maid went into his room to check on him..She found that grandpa was on the floor. She quickly called my step-grandma (but we normally call her ahma)..n ahma called mum.. as my step aunt n her family is in Genting on that very day..
When mum got to grandpa's house, he was awake but he's complaining that his left arm is in pain.. As the home doctor arrived, the doctor advice mum to admit my grandpa into Loh Guan Lye's hosp. So from that day on,we've visited grandpa almost every single night.. Aft that, when mum rest assured that everything's fine.. Mum went for her team building trip.
ON that very Sunday,28th Nov 2010, Grandpa was sent into ICU..Coz the doctor said that his blood pressure has gone very low..So mum was in her team building trip, she ask the 3 of us to visit grandpa n see how's everything.. So everything was fine then..
After for a few days, grandpa's condition was stable n he's admitted to the normal ward..but he couldnt talk properly as he got stroke.. but then I remember him smiling when he held my mum's hand.. n when he looked at us.. n there's one time where he stared at e ceiling.. my mum asked him to sleep, and my mum put her hand on grandpa's forehead juz to close his eyes.. Grandpa got mad,n ask mum not to disturb.. Mei n I was laughin then..
SO as per the doctor,grandpa's condition is currently stable.. everything's fine..But unfortunately on the 5th Dec 2010,when mum thinks that grandpa's fine in hosp.. On that day itself my grandpa's heart stopped.. when I got the news I cried so hard..N cruelly my aunt asks me to work n not to go with her.. I hate her for that..
In the end，grandpa was saved by the doctors..But it was a 5 minutes too late.. From then on, grandpa couldnt wake up n was a vegetable then. NO matter wat,he still can hear us talking.. I remembered his tears running down from his eyes thru his face when I talked to him.. It breaks my heart to see him like this..
Mum thought that they're taking grandpa home as the doctors say he couldnt survive.. But it was another news the next day.. The doctors say that he's currently in a stable condition apart from the life support that they are supporting him with..everything's fine.
So 2nd aunt (mum's sis)who's a government servant as a teacher..wrote a letter asking for transfer to GH..So they made all the arrangements to get grandpa transfer..
ON 9th December 2010,Thursday, Grandpa got transferred to General Hospital. From that day on,I've been bugging my mum to bring me to visit grandpa.. but she said that the visiting time aint right..I work until 6pm by the time v get thr confirm cannot visit grandpa edi.. Coz their visiting time is until 8pm sharp only.. When i said that I wanna take leave juz to accompany grandpa,mum n mei. But mum keep saying no..Mum ask me to visit grandpa on Saturday aft work. She promised to bring me there..
Saturday comes.. I've been so excited to visit grandpa after work,waiting for the time to pass by fast.. when the clock strikes 3pm,I quickly pack my bag n got home. By the time I got home, I dint see mum's car anywhere.. I called mei,mei told me that they are in Penang edi.. It breaks my heart that mum had prmised but she told me she forgot..I was mad n sad..
On that night,I remembered Franklin called,I cried while talking on the phone to him.. Coz I dun get to c grandpa n I hv a bad feeling of it.. The feeling had bothered me eversince grandpa admitted hospital..It kept me up that night.
Sunday,12th December 2010,mum went out with aunt Lily n aunt Molly early in the morning to GH.. wanted to see the doctor to ask abt grandpa's condition. While the 3 of us went for mass. SO aft mass we came home,n mum was in grandma's house..At the time of 1pm,mum called us to go to grandma's house to meet up..but Jess said that she's tired n she took nap for a while. ard 2pm mum called again, ask us to go to grandma's house now..
While we were otw to grandma's house,mum called again asking us to rush over coz grandpa got prob d.. then we picked mum n aunt molly up fron grandma's house n quickly rush to GH.. Grandpa dint wait for us.. while we were almost reaching,by juz a turn away grandpa passed away.
I cried so hard.. when I got to see him.. I held his hand.. n it was cold..
Grandpa..I'm sorry that I didn't visit u after u got transferred. I'm sorry that I've stopped running to u n hugging u like I used to do when I was young.. Grandpa.. I'm sorry that I couldn't spend much time with u when I was young n growing up..Grandpa..thank you for everything..
I LOVE YOU Grandpa! n I'll miss you owaz..
When mum got to grandpa's house, he was awake but he's complaining that his left arm is in pain.. As the home doctor arrived, the doctor advice mum to admit my grandpa into Loh Guan Lye's hosp. So from that day on,we've visited grandpa almost every single night.. Aft that, when mum rest assured that everything's fine.. Mum went for her team building trip.
ON that very Sunday,28th Nov 2010, Grandpa was sent into ICU..Coz the doctor said that his blood pressure has gone very low..So mum was in her team building trip, she ask the 3 of us to visit grandpa n see how's everything.. So everything was fine then..
After for a few days, grandpa's condition was stable n he's admitted to the normal ward..but he couldnt talk properly as he got stroke.. but then I remember him smiling when he held my mum's hand.. n when he looked at us.. n there's one time where he stared at e ceiling.. my mum asked him to sleep, and my mum put her hand on grandpa's forehead juz to close his eyes.. Grandpa got mad,n ask mum not to disturb.. Mei n I was laughin then..
SO as per the doctor,grandpa's condition is currently stable.. everything's fine..But unfortunately on the 5th Dec 2010,when mum thinks that grandpa's fine in hosp.. On that day itself my grandpa's heart stopped.. when I got the news I cried so hard..N cruelly my aunt asks me to work n not to go with her.. I hate her for that..
In the end，grandpa was saved by the doctors..But it was a 5 minutes too late.. From then on, grandpa couldnt wake up n was a vegetable then. NO matter wat,he still can hear us talking.. I remembered his tears running down from his eyes thru his face when I talked to him.. It breaks my heart to see him like this..
Mum thought that they're taking grandpa home as the doctors say he couldnt survive.. But it was another news the next day.. The doctors say that he's currently in a stable condition apart from the life support that they are supporting him with..everything's fine.
So 2nd aunt (mum's sis)who's a government servant as a teacher..wrote a letter asking for transfer to GH..So they made all the arrangements to get grandpa transfer..
ON 9th December 2010,Thursday, Grandpa got transferred to General Hospital. From that day on,I've been bugging my mum to bring me to visit grandpa.. but she said that the visiting time aint right..I work until 6pm by the time v get thr confirm cannot visit grandpa edi.. Coz their visiting time is until 8pm sharp only.. When i said that I wanna take leave juz to accompany grandpa,mum n mei. But mum keep saying no..Mum ask me to visit grandpa on Saturday aft work. She promised to bring me there..
Saturday comes.. I've been so excited to visit grandpa after work,waiting for the time to pass by fast.. when the clock strikes 3pm,I quickly pack my bag n got home. By the time I got home, I dint see mum's car anywhere.. I called mei,mei told me that they are in Penang edi.. It breaks my heart that mum had prmised but she told me she forgot..I was mad n sad..
On that night,I remembered Franklin called,I cried while talking on the phone to him.. Coz I dun get to c grandpa n I hv a bad feeling of it.. The feeling had bothered me eversince grandpa admitted hospital..It kept me up that night.
Sunday,12th December 2010,mum went out with aunt Lily n aunt Molly early in the morning to GH.. wanted to see the doctor to ask abt grandpa's condition. While the 3 of us went for mass. SO aft mass we came home,n mum was in grandma's house..At the time of 1pm,mum called us to go to grandma's house to meet up..but Jess said that she's tired n she took nap for a while. ard 2pm mum called again, ask us to go to grandma's house now..
While we were otw to grandma's house,mum called again asking us to rush over coz grandpa got prob d.. then we picked mum n aunt molly up fron grandma's house n quickly rush to GH.. Grandpa dint wait for us.. while we were almost reaching,by juz a turn away grandpa passed away.
I cried so hard.. when I got to see him.. I held his hand.. n it was cold..
Grandpa..I'm sorry that I didn't visit u after u got transferred. I'm sorry that I've stopped running to u n hugging u like I used to do when I was young.. Grandpa.. I'm sorry that I couldn't spend much time with u when I was young n growing up..Grandpa..thank you for everything..
I LOVE YOU Grandpa! n I'll miss you owaz..
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