I think its coming back again...

.... these few days has been feeling weird..its as same as wat i felt b4.. the sickness tt i had b4..

a few weeks back..e doc told me tt im cured.. bt rite now... i hv to go back for a check up.. i feel its coming back again..my heart pulpitation..my breathing.. my hands are trembling again...getting realli stressed up..getting angry over lil things again...

its hyperthyroidism again...

sighs...when will it b gone..?? when will it stop? i dont want to take any medications anymore..i dun wan to go through those needles n taking lotsa dose every time..my throat is swelling up again... bit by bit..

i realli wan it to stop...i realli do...

yesterday..sms ge..bt then he juz got back from his work..so he's pretty tired..same goes to alicia jie jie...wanted to tell them abt this..bt they seem bz..dun wan to bother them...

then again..with $$ problem.. he called mum up to ask for $$ for mum is not goin to b back this week...due to she's got a meeting in hatyai... then mum called me ystday to give him 50 bucks... i told mum tt i juz gave him 10 bucks this morning..dun tell me its not enuf to spend it for the day??!! im really furious.. im not use to giving him $$, so i pass e 50 bucks to da jie today...as mum reminded me to give him $$ yesterday nite...

sighs... when will he stop asking for $$?? n go work?? its impossible tt no1s want to hire him.. at his age..there r so many vacancies around in penang...as drivers n all... nobody will look down on him when he's taking up small jobs like this... at least he's earning his own $$ rather than asking from his WIFE! yes..children giving their parents $$ is rite one way..by e thing is his attitude of not working n goin out all e time..lying all e time..its not e rite way to ask for $$.. its not e rite thing to do also...unless he's paralyse..then its rite for me to give him the support tt he needs..

im really frustrated...wat can i do??

08th October 2009 @ 1621hrs

.... speechless...work is stressing me out... plus these days been getting angry easily alot...too many phone calls = too many unreasonable customers...

plus colleagues are also one of the unreasonable ppl...

juz now msn ge...greet him n ask how's work.. he's been bz these days n all..with new sem started @ his uni... bt then..he dint ask how m i..how's work n stuff..juz replyin to my Qs...
sometimes i felt like he farther away ald.. i think he's better communicating wit jie n mei..bt not me..dunno y.. sighs... hope everything's goin on well 4 him...

01 October 2009 Thursday @ 2200hrs

hmm..one heck of a day.. though everything when well @ work..

mei went too Pulau Langkawi organized by her school.. feel so lonely rite now.. da jie went for her dating time..as usual on thurs.. as dad went out..n who the hells knw where he'd been..

so im alone @ home..with my pc to accompany me..haha

mum's home.. as in for her work actually.. n she's goin out later for supper with her colleagues.. dunnno whether she'll bring me along or not..hehe xD..technically..no

well as for my work decision..comes another chance for me to work some other places..this job is assistant in sales.. same thing..working for relatives.. bt this one is good.. my cousin brother..

he's willing to take me up.. as in to let me b expose in sales challenges n stuff..so rite now i dunno whether shud i take it or not.. coz its gonna b hard..

rite now my plan is to work...save up.. go for college n take up hotel n tourism management course..later goin for cabin crew job..(which is my dream job) so i realli hope that i will make e rite decision for my future..

these days..earthquake,tsunami are coming up...one day after another..i realli hope the end of the world arent coming..so worried.. i wan to enjoy my life, my youth..my time..reali hope tt i cn go out rite now..hanging out wif friends..*crossing fingers*bt they r hving exams now..thus haven been in touch wit them for quite some time...

reali hope tt i could get out n hv fun rite now..staying @ home everyday after work..aint fun... :(