Work...

Today @ work it really is frustrating..

First thing is whenever my aunt goes out.. Sometimes what pisses me off is she went out for hair do..go to temple.. this n that during office hours sigh... I wouldn't hv mind if she goes to the bank cause..its under company's purposes..I dun think that goin to hair salons n temple are for company's purposes lurh..

So she goes today to the temple. She call n checked to see whether I'm doin my job anot..
Before she went out, she said.. "Jackie,I'm goin out.. U do the follow ups..".. My uncle (boss) didnt even know that she went out.. n sometimes we had to lie for her lurh when she is doin her hair.. After she left,not even 5 mins she called "Jackie hv u follow up with the drivers?","Jackie, follow up with this customer.","Jackie,settle this prob","Jackie do this,Jackie do that".. Jackie to everything.. hmmm I cant even hv my lunch in peace..
Yes,she's the lady boss of the company.. But for heaven's sake y me? Y do u refer everything to me? What abt the other employees that u hire? R they juz for decoration? I dun understand y does she push everything to me..

Yes,I'm her niece.. But then I've been working here longer than any other office emplyees that she hire.. 4 years edi.. 4 years.. How much is my salary? Even the other employees r hving a higher salary than I do.. I realli juz dun understand.. Even she herself has to come n ask me questions.. sigh.. I really wanna quit my job but then I haven got to find one..
I'm askin my friends in JB to help me in searching for a job so that I could move back to JB.. I realli do..

Well, SIA's open interview's coming.. I'm juz worried abt my make up n my dark circles that couldnt be covered up.. =( I juz hope that my smiles makes a good impression for e interviewers.. PLease pray for me that i get it this time.. Thank you!

My trip to JB 19th Feb 2011 - 21st Feb 2011

This time around.. the trip to JB was well worth.. =)

Because, I get to meet up with CC n Raechie.. n CC's bf,Maurice..
hmmm Maurice.. nice guy bt with the hair of Justin Bieber.. I think Justin stole his look rather than Maurice copying Justin.. LOLs.. XD

ON 19.02.11,Saturday.. the 5 of us including Persis went for a movie in KSL City.. which CC said that its a new mall.. So we went n checked it out.. not much of a WOW factor to me though..

Persis n I got there late for a movie.. so Raechie n CC bought the 6.30pm tickets.. well Persis n I dint know what movie they bought.. N we met them up at e tickets counter.. Guess wad.. All of us r watching "No Strings Attached" hmmmm... =.=

In the theater was realli super duper very cold..All of us r shivering.. while waitin for e movie to end.. E movie was funny.. but way too draggy.. Raechel n I almost slept.. LOLs
After movie, Raechie suggested us to eat at Seoul Garden.. n so.. we're like mad ppl..looking for the restaurant.. totally blur dunno where to go oso.. hahaha...

At last! Its located at e ground floor..hmmm =.=
I dun remember paying 1st then makan wor in Seoul Garden..But we actually paid 1st then only can go in.. So they say wastage of a 100g additional charges of RM 5.00/100g..

Unfortunately.. e 3 of us (me,Maurice & Persis) dun take prawns.. CC & Raechie took a sum of it.. CC was so scared that they'll charge us for the wastage.. So she tuck it up n ate all e prawns while Raechie peel the shells for her.. hahaha pity her..
Then at e last minute, I only tot of we paid for e costs of e buffet.. Y scared abt e wastage?? They're not gonna check aft we leave.. LOLs.. SOwee CC.. No more Seoul Garden next time..
So aft a huge dinner.. we went home..

ON Sunday, 20.02.11.. A pig who cant wake up for mass when he came home ard 2-3am..
Funny thing is he talks in his sleep.. N at that time I was taking some stuff from my luggage in his room.. I was wondering.. "Is he talking to me??" I wanted to respond bt I realise that he talks in his sleep.. hahaha
Ard 3pm.. I met up with Raechie again!!! =D We chatted alot while walking ard.. Then we've realised that we've finished walking the whole City Square la..chatted since we met till we go home.. n then we continue again on Facebook! LOLs

On Monday,21.02.11 (time to go home).. Since my flight is at night.. Morning me n kor had roti canai at our usual place along wit Edwin kor.. Well, i dun understand y my two sisters doesnt like him.. but I do.. We can talk like as if we're buddies like that.. =)
So i spend my whole day watching tv wit kor..coz he's working from home.. =) Thank you Kor for accompanying me! Love u loads!

At night, I've washed up n prepared everything to go for my flight ard 10.15pm.. Persis actually has tkd class..but in e end it was cancelled due to a few only showed up.. So we went straight to e airport.. Along the way.. i was super quiet due to my phone out of a sudden shut down.. blackout.. =( no matter how we've tried to revive it.. still no use.. so i juz left it in my bag.. Persis was so uncomfortable for me being so quiet.. so I actually talked for a while.. n shut up for a while.. till we reach e airport.. after saying our goodbyes.. I cried.. when im walking away..

It has owaz been the hardest part to leave JB for me.. especially from my brother's arms..
I really hope that i could get a job in either JB or Singapore.. Coz i realli do hope that i could b e one moving back to JB..instead of staying here in Penang..

THe next trip is coming soon.. =) Anxious n excited to go back to JB again!

Lost faith in Love

Well, this trip to JB has made me realized loads of stuff.. Most importantly after when one made me realized that i've lost in faith for love.. After seeing wad happen to my mum,Jess & some friends.. Has made me tot of being in a relationship is a problem.. That's y after my 1st failed relationship till now.. I'm still single.. Somebody asked me.. "Dont tell me after so much had happen n passed.. U've lost ur faith in looking for a guy??" I answered "Yea.. After seeing n listening to probs abt failed n broken marriages/relationships.. I've really lost my faith in it.." Sometimes I juz can't believe my eyes n ears abt seeing/hearing all e probs.. Coz I tot he/she (whom I loved n cared abt) really is a great person.. Who knows they end up doin e wrong thing..When e prob is solved..It's juz realli disappointing to see that after a while, he/she nvr realizes that e prob has given us a hard time to get it solved.. In additional to it... They're doin it again.. What's more disappointing is.. They nvr cherish e ppl who helped them thru it.. Instead they think tat they're (problem solvers) suppose to do it.. It's really frustrating to hear ppl asking me.. "When r u getting a bf?? Since 2 of ur sisters ald in a relationship" Hmmm... I wish one day I could get over this fear.. Bt currently.. I can't..

11th Nov 2011 - Tuesday @ 0000 hours

Love... Hmm definition of love? - A profound tender,passionate affection for another person - a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection for a parent or a child or a friend - to a person whom love is felt.. Etc etc.. Love has got a lot of meanings in it.. Bt hv u ever wonder what it really is? Neither do I.. Haha.. Eversince the puppy love that I had when I was form 3.. I haven found the one yet till now..weird huh? =) everybody's asking me.. U got bf anot? I answered them no.. They r not believing my words.. :$ Keep asking "Realli arr?? Realli??" I was determined.. Cause I realli dun hv one yet.. =D Well.. Being single is either an advantage or disadvantage.. Freedom.. U can do anything u wan n not worry abt e other half even when ur hanging out wit another guy or gal.. Hmm.. Lol.. I've observe ppl pretty much.. Well.. For girls.. When we're single we would be like.. "OMG.. I wish to b hug by my bf.. Bt I dun hv one..=(" the funniest one that I saw my friend did when we were watching some Korean dramas.. When the actors get lovey dovey wit e actress.. She'll b like "How I wish my future bf would do this for me.. How I wish that it will all b romantic" etc etc.. For guys.. Hmm haven realli get to figure it out yet.. Hahaha.. Bt when ur in a relationship.. Some of it lasts.. N they're realli lovey dovey.. N some of it will b like.. I hate u bt meanwhile I love u.. Hmmm.. When e other half ain't around.. Some guys/girls will say "Yay! Time to get the party started!!" Well.. From time to time.. I've lost my track to being love n to love somebody.. Y?? Cause I've seen couples fighting wit my own eyes.. I've seen couples quarreling over a small matter..I've seen friends getting troubled by the other half.. In other words getting hurt.. I've lost my confidence towards finding "the one".. When ppl asked me "When n how was ur first kiss like?" I answered.. I haven kissed a person before.. How would i know?? Lol.. They were like shocked n I think u r too.. Haha Bet ur thinking "R u for Real??" Well yea.. In my past puppy love.. He requested bt I refused.. Ask the guy if u dun belief me.. Well.. The time will come I hope.. We'll see what's plan the e guy above has plan for me.. =)

10th Jan 2011 - Monday @2005hours

Hv u ever tot of.. How ugly u looked?? Hv u ever doubted urself could get a nice guy to be wit?? Well.. I do.. No matter how perfect u gonna be.. There will b some disadvantages abt e physical look or even attitude.. That's y they say.. Nothing's n no one's perfect.. I would say.. I do hv e nice body.. Bt I hv a big fat ass n big fat legs..I do admire where ppl hv perfect figures.. Real nice figures.. Where they can find jeans that fits perfectly. Where I'm hving a freaking hard time to look for a pair of jeans..coz my ass n thighs r huge.. N I realli mean HUGE! My heart sank when I look at my back in e mirror.. It's realli like a big fat lady from behind.. Sighs.. Well.. Being heritage by my Mum's side to hv big fat ass n legs.. R meant to b.. Bt I realli hope that working on it would work for my legs to b thinner n qualify for at most all e airlines interviews.. God! Help me please... Desperate huge legs girl..

09th Jan 2011-Sunday @1300hrs

The beginning of the year seems to pass that easily.. Well, it doesn't change anything at all at most.. Hmmm.. There's alot of things that will go thru our mind.. Sometimes it's juz some random songs,sometimes it's juz some past memories,sometimes it's wad ur planning,sometimes it's e opposite sex of a person.. Bt most of e time.. It's juz a block of darkness.. When it comes for me to write,it will owaz go blank.. Of wad I tot before to write.. Maybe I shud take a pen n sheets of paper to write wherever I go.. I wonder wad r the things that goes on other ppl's mind rite now.. Hmmm.. U wouldn't know unless they tell u themselves.. Most ppl says that,beginning of a new year it's a beginning of a new start.. Well wad do u think? Life is either like a story or a drama.. No matter wad,it's another chapter/scene that u gotta start telling/acting.. We're living in a world which is full of mysteries n surprises.. Sometimes it's good n sometimes its bad.. U wouldn't know wads gonna happen next.. U wouldn't even know wads is in e plan in ur life.. Plans.. Hmm.. No matter how u plan ur life.. Sometimes it'll go smoothly,or juz another bump to break ur plans.. Surprises.. Surprises.. That u wouldn't know.. No matter wad.. Juz a smile away to keep everything aaight.. At least is wad I think..

20th Dec 2010 - Monday @ 2020 hours

sighs..

Sometimes, its really disappointing..

Elizabeth from Choice group called me on Saturday, asked me whether Esther n I wanna go for their annual dinner.. So we said yes..

Cause this dinner was the only chance for us to join in Choice group.. N as planned a long time ago, that Esther n I wanted to join Choice to be a part of them.

Choice is an organization where they gather Catholic working youth adults together.. To go on adventures,to help out, to do most of the things together..

So talked abt the dinner, Elizabeth called while i was in the car with mum n told me that she had passed the tickets to Fiona,whom also from Choice.So i said ok.. N mum asked who called la.. so i said that it was Elizabeth n told her all about the Choice group n about the dinner. She seems ok with it.. but its juz one problem, who's gonna fetch me there.. I told her that Esther is oso coming.. N mum's face totally change, n said no cannot go..
So cerita came la.. She told me not to be with Esther for too much as she's goin to b a bad influence to me.. this n that la..

I was like.. Esther is not lidat.. The Esther I know is kind,funny n mostly outgoing.. She has great parents.. Its not that I'm saying that mum is not good.. Mum's the best of all but then she's too controlling over me..

N by juz listening to what others is saying,she claim that everything is either bad or good.. Bt I hope that she could know Esther like I know her.. N i realli hope that she listens to my point of view of Esther.. But I doubt that she listens..

Sometimes, I would like to tell mum that I'm growing up.. I know what's right n what's wrong.. Yes,sometimes its abt ppl thinking that their friends are good while others knows that they're bad.. But I know what I'm doin.. I know where I go n what I'm doin..
I realli hope that mum realli could understand me.. I realli do hope that this day could come..